resources + links | activities for children | activities for teens

Many children who are grieving the death of someone, or who are witness to traumatic loss, such as is happening with recent tragedies, feel emotion on many levels, not the least of which is physical. Planning activities for children and teens that allows them to express their feelings provides a healthy and effective outlet for the many emotions they are experiencing. These activities can also bring parents and children together, at a time when the support of the family is of unparalleled importance.

In the book, Fire in My Heart, Ice in My Veins: A Journal for Teenagers Experiencing a Loss , by Enid Samuel Traisman, M.S.W., there are statements that help teens write about their feelings during a time of loss.

• Sometimes I find myself imagining that if these things were different, your death might not have really happened.
  
• I wish you could tell me what your death was like, what really happened. I think you'd say… "
• I can physically feel the pain of your death, and this is where and how I feel it in my body. "
• Here is a drawing of what my pain looks like…"
• This is what I would write on your tombstone so that everyone who would read it would have an idea of the person you were. "
• I often wear a mask to hide what I am really feeling. I do this because…"
• Late at night, when the world is asleep, I am awake thinking about…"
• Our friends got together and did something special in your memory…"
• Music helps release feelings; here are some songs/lyrics that mean a lot to me. "
• A poem that I wrote (or is special)… "
• I think about the meaning of life. Why people die when they do… "
• This is what helps me find meaning in my pain over your death… "